All you have to do is to committ suicide, yeah you heard me right. I don't want any of you assholes contaminating my shangri-la. Once all of you are gone, I will be left alone living my life like a saint, on the top of a one tree hill.
My morning will begin with a gigantic boner, which won't die until I rape a crocodile while taking bath in toxic waste river. Then I will take a huge crap on graves of children who were sacrificed to shape my perfect world, wiping off my shit with pages from Gita/Bible/Quran. Hunting for food may be a problem for an average shithead, fool enough to read this blog, but it will be a cake walk for genius like me. All I have to do is to lie naked on the ground and wait until some dumb animals like bears and dolphins are lured by the aroma of my salty balls (all girls who were lucky enough to taste my balls told me the experience was somewhere between achieving superorgasmic state and immortality). Killing them would be effortless, i will just look them in their eyes and they will die of sheer fear. I will consume their soul telepathically adding another thousand years to my life and leave their bodies to be sodomized by my pet saber tooth. In post breakfast sex, i will fuck Lisa Ann to death and resurrect her.
To pass my time, apart from fucking, I will track species of animals that piss me off, and drive them to extinction. Pandas top my list of animals to slaughter, followed by rabits and poodles. I will capture and tie a panda pull its pubic hair one by one, then weld its dick to its ass, make it drink plenty of water so that its ass fills with piss and burst, making a fucking mess of its intestines and leaving it withering in pain. Or better yet, i will leave pandas alone, and they will realize how meaningless and dull their lives are, and they will all cry themselves to death.
My workout will be moving mountains,rivers and volcanoes, shaping landscapes to satisfy my whims. My post workout meal will involve some more sex with Lisa Ann. Every night, I will watch Fight Club, and will be able to appreciate how beautiful the world is with just ME. Closing the night on this happy note, i will fuck an anti-human cyborg, for Lisa Ann's pussy will be sore for few more hours. Satan bless Lisa Ann.....
